I'm gaining again, I was almost back up to 144 but I've brought it back down to 142.4 I think. Needs to be lower. I'm falling behind in school work, I'm addicted to buying new clothes and shoes, I never see my friends anymore. Gah. How did things get messed up so quickly. I should be in the 130s right now. I should be shrinking so fast that I can't buy new clothes because I keep getting smaller and smalller, I should be happy and hang out with my friends more.
Right now I just want someone to hug me. I want them to hold me in their arms and pet my hair and tell me that everything is going to be okay, and that if it's not okay they'll make it okay because they love me and will protect me from the whole world. I know that's stupid. I should be strong by myself. I shouldn't need someone else. Strong girls don't need a guy to hold them up, skinny girls don't need a guy to pull them down. But I'm neither. I'm weak and fat and right now I need someone. But I don't have someone. And its because I'm weak and fat. The irony isn't lost on me. But it is making me tired
Emma: Eventually I want to find the perfect chunky knit sweater, then my life will be complete. wearing boots is one of my favorite parts of fall :)
Venus: I don't care if commenting two times screws with your OCD because it makes me feel extra special :D so thanks for that. Maralin Monroe was absolutely gorgeous and I would kill to look as great as she did at 140, too bad I'm lacking two key things. Boobs and confidence. That lady had some serious curves going on to give her a hourglass shape, too bad I'm a pear, and she just oozed confidence out of every pore. Wow it does not feel like 20 pounds, I feel like I'm still as big as i was the day that i started this blog lol. How much have you lost since you started your blog? I feel like I lost more quickly before I blogged, but I'm happier now that I have one. Weird.
Vampire: Awe thanks, I'm really into clothes and fashion lately, but unfortunately I have no clue what I'm doing :p I have no clue what that's about and I should probably delete it because it really weirds me out that it's there