Monday, March 31, 2014
I'm spiraling out of control. I don't know what my weight is anymore. The new bf said that he likes hipbones though so I'm working on that. Doc put me on some antidepressants and turns out they don't mix well with alcohol or anything else for that matter. Plus they don't work. I'm emotionally no different, the only thing that numbs is the razor blade. I told him about the suicide attempt, the half assed suicide attempt. He cried i think. I didn't. I couldn't. We talked, mostly he talked and I gave single syllable answers. I fell asleep in his arms and we haven't talked about it since. This weekend I had too much to drink, among other things. Flirted with another guy in front of him, or so I'm told. We talked about it. Now we aren't talking at all.